A Walk to Remember

There is nothing better than an evening spent with friends. You know how there are a few days that you’ll never forget. Well, today was one such day.

I woke up to a gloomy morning. It was raining, and the morning felt dull & lifeless! I had a hectic day ahead though, so I couldn’t afford be a skiver. I went to the living room and received a bolt from the blue; “Michael Jackson dead at 50”. I mean who’d expect that to happen! Then, the rest of the day was spent filling my sister’s online admission form. Online huh! Sounds simple, but believe me the entire process is just horrible and one big fuss! Jaded, I decided to go out for a walk with friends. I called Siraj and Jui, and we decide to meet up at Shivaji Park. Jui said that she had a class to attend, and would meet us a bit late. So Siraj and I met up first.

We had just completed a few rounds, when it started pouring. There was a shade constructed just opposite the “Mina Tai Statue”, so we took cover there. After a few minutes Jui showed up, and we began walking in the rain. We learned that Jui, was actually taking a class, and not attending one. She was teaching Algebra to 9th grade kids. Now you see, Jui is this tiny little girl and not at all a teacher or a professor types. The very thought of her teaching, rather yelling at kids, makes me burst out laughing! Although she claims, “When it comes to studies, I’m very strict!” Oooooh! (Ya right Jui! … Haha … I’m still laughing). So, moving on … (Haha …)

When the three of us were chatting, there was this dog which started following us. We almost completed like half a round, and this dog was still stringing along with us. Jui, being this complete animal lover, began to act all playful with this dog. Siraj joined in too. I, the guy who is afraid of anything with more than two legs, was petrified. I was all like “Guys, don’t!” “Let the damn dog be!” “Please! I’m scared out here!” and these guys would just burst out laughing! The funny part is that when we moved, the dog moved with us. When we stopped, the damn dog stopped too! Now, I began to walk affront. It was only then, that we realized that this damn dog was following me. When I walked, it walked. I stopped, it stopped! I was shit scared, and these guys couldn’t stop laughing.

The limit was that, I got off the side walk and this stupid dog trailed along. I got back on the side walk and it did the exact same thing. Completely freaked, I crossed the road … and guess what! The dog too, crossed the freaking road! I froze then and there! A few seconds later Jui and Siraj came to my side of the road. Now, it was not a huge dog and we guessed that it must have been scared or hungry. Jui suggested that maybe we should give it something to eat and then it would stop coming after us. Siraj and I were like “Ya right! So that it keeps coming after us!”, and we began walking, like a scalded cat, in the opposite direction. At least I didn’t bother looking back! Later Jui said that the dog lost its bearings and went back. Aah! What a relief! Damn! Siraj said that he had the “Karz Theme” playing in his head the entire time. Jui added that, that dog must have been my wife in my previous life. Ya! Haha … very funny!

We were a little wet, because of the rains, and wanted to have a warm cup of coffee. So we were walking towards the Cadel Road CCD, laughing over the dog incident. When Jui says, “Kuch bhi bolo, par yeh, hum teeno ko hamesha yaad rahega!”, and I realized that sach much yeh shyam mujhe hamesha yaad rahega. This is one evening, I will never forget! Maybe because of the walk in the rain, the laughing out loud, pulling each other’s leg, the warm cup of coffee or mainly that stupid dog! I just don’t know!

I’m sure that the three of us will burst out laughing every time we think of this evening. Truly, this will forever be an evening to remember or more importantly, just …. A walk to remember!

The Vicious Circle of Loneliness & Misery

Ever wonder why you are born ? Does your life matter ? What is "Life" ? “Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.” as Woody Allen puts it.

Loneliness is a strange concept, isn't it ? Is it a state of confusion ? Is it boredom ? or is it simply the realization that you are alone. To me loneliness is the realization that the universe is functioning perfectly, yet I am somehow perfectly locked within myself. One can't explain why or what makes you feel this way. Loneliness is like an earthquake, you don't see it coming, it just hits you ... and then we all know what the after effects can be !! A thousand questions fill your mind and with each question you keep falling deeper and deeper into this abyss of nothingness. Lost, confused, alone !! All you have with you is an infinite set of questions and hazy answers. The more you think about it the more you tend to go into this subconscious state of mind ... you start losing it ... talking to yourself ... hallucinating at some point.

What is this ... why is this ? It simply doesn't have one answer. More than anything, it is people around you who make you feel this way. Sometimes it is because of discrimination or just because of neglect or how people treat you in general. When you're in your room, when you're just staring into space ... thinking about people, friends .... and you feel so out of place, like you don't belong and that your existence doesn't matter to anyone. You sometimes start feeling that people are there just to check whether you are still alive. People whom you were so close to, now, are irritated by your presence. All this thinking, all this wandering of thoughts, all these twisted toxic things leads to pain equivalent to a thousand ants biting you. Loneliness, alone, pain, realization of pain !!

You're standing still, staring into the abyss, as the world moves around you at the speed of sound. Eventually all of these feeling, which started with the realization that you are lonely ... turn into misery. "Misery is almost always the result of thinking." as Joseph Joubert says. Misery is like diabetes, it can be treated, but cannot be cured. A part of every misery is it's shadow: The fact that you are not merely miserable, but have to keep on thinking about the fact that you are miserable. I not only live each endless day in misery, but live each day thinking about living each day in misery. It doesn't matter how many new haircuts you get, or gyms you join, or how many mugs of beer you drink with your friends... you still go to bed every night going over every detail and wonder what you did wrong or how you could have misunderstood, and how in the hell for that brief moment you could think that you were that happy.

All these severe rush of emotions ... Life is like a roller-coaster ride, all you want to do is wait for it to end, even as you grab on tight and scream your lungs out. As Jim Morrison said "People fear death even more than pain. It's strange that they fear death. Life hurts a lot more than death. At the point of death, the pain is over. Yeah, I guess it is a friend !!"

My View Of How The F.R.I.E.N.D.S Movie Would Be Like

The name says it all...yet, this is how the Daily Mail put it ...."Finally, the film production of the most successful TV show is given a go-ahead." Oh Yeah...you got that right... F.R.I.E.N.D.S. The Movie is Coming... This was the best news I heard in the July of 2008. I was so excited, like most of the F.R.I.E.N.D.S. Fanatics out there. But, unfortunately a few days later reports came in saying that the movie is denied and Warner Bros. and Spokespersons of a few of the F.R.I.E.N.D.S. stars declared that the whole thing was a rumor...

So I guess for now the movie is not happening ... So what !! I started imaging how the movie would be ... and the following is what I think the the movie would be about:
"I think it'll be about the gang getting back together for Ross & Rachel's wedding and how Ross & Rachel come together as a family because of little Emma. Monica and Chandler have settled down as one traditional happy family and having a fun time with their kids Jack and Erica. May be Pheobe is pregnant with twins this time and Joey, who becomes a big movie star, brings Alex (From JOEY series) along. I hope it ends with Joey and Alex getting married along with Ross & Rachel. It'll also be great to see Gunther, Jack, Judy, Carol, Susan, Ben and others have been upto. Honestly people we all have been longing to see the F.R.I.E.N.D.S Gang hang out at Central Perk again and hear Pheobe sing 'Smelly Cat' ....."

Let's hope that the movie does come out some day ... for all of us who are in love with these six amazing F.R.I.E.N.D.S ... until then everybody sing with me "Smelly Cat, Smeelllly Caat What are they feeding you ? ..."

Friendships, Feelings, Engineering & Misunderstandings

Well people, it’s not easy being a guy, and that too a guy who is sensitive and has chosen Engineering as a major. I tell you, it sure takes a lot out of you! Now I'm a person whose life totally revolves around his friends (Or that is what I'd like to believe. Lol) All this is smooth and fine till you realize that you have feelings for someone whom you've know for a really long time and until now had no clue that you were falling for her. You want to spend more time with her, and God damn you want to tell her how you feel, and you always have this fear of "What if she says NO!!" All of this somehow makes your friends feel that you don't have time for them ("Oohh ...You're NEGLECTING US !!, You're Changing, etc. are the usual remarks.)

Now things start getting a little complicated ... "Priorities" as a friend said to me ... "Set Your Priorities" (In a completely pissed off tone). Like they say "Rock, Hard place ... and Me". You are literally vacillating. Now to make matters worse comes Engineering ... It fills your life with journals, assignments, presentations, class tests and submission deadlines. So now you have time for no one. Here "Misunderstandings" make a grand entry. Your friends think that your lying when you tell them that you can't make it, and this person you have feelings for ... haha, forget it ('cos IT HURTS !! ... Lol) and then the cherry on top of this cake, Engineering, which chases you like a dog chasing a cat and this same cat chasing a mouse. The messed up part is that you end up feeling like all three of them, you are just not sure of which one exactly, a dog, a cat or a mouse ? You're in between the devil and the deep blue sea, Man !!

I tell you this man, its not easy being a guy ... It’s like Friendships, Feelings, Engineering & Misunderstandings have surrounded you ... They each have a rope around your neck and keep pulling you with equal amounts of force. You ... just don't know where to go ...

My First Post

Well, I was never really serious about blogging, but then a friend convinced me that it would be a great idea to jot down my thoughts and ideas ... share my view with people. This seemed to be a great way to share my feelings on various topics and issues. Maybe share a few secrets as well ... after all some secrets are meant to be shared ...